It is that time of the year again when a subtle realisation occurs that gifting in NCR is no less than any competitive sport. Each year, you prepare in advance, armed with lessons from the last festive season, only to realise that there are more waiting for you this season. And no matter how well you think you know your friend circle, there are always surprises. Someone sends a luxury hamper, and suddenly your box of mithai or dry fruits looks inadequate. The bigger question isn’t what to gift, but how to match last year’s generosity without appearing either stingy or extravagant. Plus, there could be added pressure if you are known as someone who always sends a gift of a certain value. You go lower than that, friends and relatives might assume (and gossip) that you are broke. You spend more, and there might be questions raised about ‘where is all this money coming from?’ Clearly, there is no winning this game.A month before the festive season begins, a budget is earmarked for Diwali gifting. There are categories within that budget, as per the hierarchy of gifting – one for neighbours, friends and acquaintances, a slightly more personalised, better gift for close friends, and a premium range for business associates. And for some, there is an added category for those who unexpectedly turn up with a gift close to Diwali. Of course, the hierarchy isn’t always determined by how close you are to someone. There are people you meet once a year but cannot afford to leave out of your gifting list, and then there are friends who would be perfectly happy sharing a box of mithai with you. The tricky part is deciding who belongs where, because getting the category wrong could mean an entire year of awkwardness. And just when you think the lists have been finalised, budgets approved and gifts dispatched, someone who wasn’t even on your list sends you an elaborate hamper. Now, what should have been a pleasant surprise becomes a fresh problem. One option is to pick up something from the stack of gifts kept aside specifically for regifting. But the real dilemma arises when the gift you have received looks rather expensive and you have absolutely no intention of spending a similar amount on a return gesture. Do you send something modest and hope they don’t notice the difference? Do you make anexception and stretch your budget? Or do you simply thank them profusely and hope that gratitude counts as reciprocation?Then comes the rather delicate business of regifting. While most people have no qualms about passing on an unopened box of dry fruits or an elaborate festive hamper, one has to be extremely careful about where it came from and where it is headed. The last thing you want is for a gift to find its way back to the person who originally sent it.There is also the question of whether a gift needs to be personally delivered or whether sending it through a driver is enough. Does dropping it off at the gate count as a festive gesture? Should you call to check if it has been received? And if someone makes the effort to personally deliver a gift, are you now expected to return the favour with a visit? Suddenly, the gifting exercise begins to resemble the scheduling of Diwali parties, with lists, locations and social obligations to manage. Perhaps the most amusing part of this entire exercise is that while everyone insists that ‘it’s the thought that counts’, an extraordinary amount of thought goes into calculating the value of the gift, the relationship with the recipient and the possible consequences of getting either wrong. By the time Diwali arrives, you have spent so much time deciding on gifting that you begin to wonder whether festive gifting was ever meant to be this complicated.
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